WORDS ARE POWERFUL

I will not forget that one incident during my sixth grade. It was the day when I first met the world’s meanest person to me. Looking out for a chair to sit on, I noticed that the one in the middle was empty and so I decided to go on it. I found everyone in the classroom so amiable and appreciated a ‘transferee’ like me except for that one. A girl approached to where I was sitting and began to hit the desk of the chair saying, “Layas! Ako ang nakaupo diyan!” Terrified by her abruptness, I timidly said ‘sorry’ and was just like a dog lowering down its ears slowly leaving the chair. It was then when I started to feel something would be going wrong all the way in my new school. Every time I would be reciting, she would often criticize. Then, the rest of the class, especially her friends, would laugh with her. I have always been intimidated by that. Her meanness continued until high school. I could hardly imagine why she, together with some of her friends, was like that to me. Their negative responses gradually reduced me into what I perceive myself to be—nothing but a sort of laughing stock. I did not even know if I was just being too sensitive or it was just her being too nasty.

All the while I have thought of my personality as something that is negative and unacceptable. It is generally my high school classmates who brought humiliation to my character. It is like they are bullying me emotionally. I find this situation true to the theory of symbolic interactionism. It is under Max Weber’s assertion that symbolic interactionism explains how individuals analyze society (including themselves) by addressing the subjective meanings that people impose them (Crossman, 2011). Most of my high school classmates imposed me critics about my personality. Hence, I later become paranoid with them (and the people around me) because of the harmful perceptions about myself. This is when my self-concept about my personality changes. I have perceived in myself that being reserved or mahinhin is something that I should not be proud of.

With symbolic interactionism, the concept of the self can be framed. This is where the “looking-glass self / generalized other,” which is the sum total of responses and expectations that we pick up from the people around us, is being formed. We naturally give more weight to the views of significant others (Symbolic Interactionism, 2013). If in my family and real friends, I can visualize myself as someone who is loved and acceptable; to my high school classmates, I can see myself as someone who is hateful and a laughing stock.

https://www.boundless.com/sociology/understanding-sociology/the-theoretical-perspectives-in-sociology/the-symbolic-interactionist-perspective/

The concept of the “looking glass self (or generalized other)" argued that the way we think about ourselves is particularly apt to be a reflection of other people's appraisals and that our self-concepts are built up in the primary groups. (Cooley, 2013).

Self-concept is the image we have of who and what we are (formed in childhood by how significant others treat/respond to us).  The self-concept is not fixed and unchanging (LaRossa & Reitzes, 1993). I am elated and totally agree with this notion. If my self-concept during my high school days is something what I perceive myself to be—nothing but a sort of a laughing stock; my self-concept now is much more confident and optimistic. This is the reason why I got interested in the symbolic interactionism theory.  I am grateful and can relate much of my character development to this principle. Criticisms have made me much stronger to be able to withstand not only painful words I encounter but to go on with life as well despite of how incessant we may be able to encounter them.

SOURCES:

Crossman, Ashley. (2011). Symbolic Interaction Theory An Overview. Retrieved December 22, 2013, from: http://sociology.about.com/od/Sociological-Theory/a/Symbolic-Interaction-Theory.htm

(Symbolic Interactionism, 2013) Univeristy of Twente. (2013, November 26). Symbolic Interactionism. Retrieved December 22, 2013, from: http://www.utwente.nl/cw/theorieenoverzicht/theory%20clusters/interpersonal%20communication%20and%20relations/symbolic_interactionism/

The Looking Glass Self (Photograph). Retrieved December 22, 2013, from: https://www.boundless.com/sociology/understanding-sociology/the-theoretical-perspectives-in-sociology/the-symbolic-interactionist-perspective/

(Cooley, 2013). Symbolic Interactionism. Retrieved December 23, 2013, from: http://www.d.umn.edu/~bmork/2306/Theories/BAMsymint.htm

 (LaRossa & Reitzes, 1993). Symbolic Interactionism Theory (adapted from Scott, Plunkett’s Course Pack). Retrieved December 23, 2013, from: http://www.csun.edu/~whw2380/542/Symbolic%20Interactionism%20Lecture.htm

ROOT OF A PARTIAL "ME"

A person’s character is influenced by several factors. The environment and the genetics are the two major dominant influencers. I believe that what I am now is a product of my experiences—and that falls under the environmental factors that influenced my identity aside from the traits I have gotten genetically from my parents.

Social interactions have to do a lot in the development of a person’s character. “No man is an island” as the saying goes. The social communication that exists in a person’s experiences may contribute a lot to one’s molded identity.

Symbolic Interactionism is formulated by Blumer (1969), a student of George Herbert Mead at the University of California whose key ideas of such theory originated. It is the process of interaction in the formation of meanings for individuals. The inspiration for this theory came from Dewey (1981), which believed that human beings are best understood in a practical, interactive relation to their environment. The theory consists of three core principles: meaning, language and thought. These core principles lead to conclusions about the creation of a person’s self and socialization into a larger community (Griffin, 1997).

·         Meaning states that humans act toward people and things according to the meanings that give to those people or things. Symbolic Interactionism holds the principal of meaning to be the central aspect of human behavior.

·         Language gives humans a means by which to negotiate meaning through symbols. Humans identify meaning in speech acts with others.

·         Thought modifies each individual’s interpretation of symbols. Thought is a mental conversation that requires different points of view.

With these three elements the concept of the self can be framed. People use ‘the looking-glass self’: they take the role of the other, imagining how we look to another person. The self is a function of language, without talk there would be no self-concept. People are part of a community, where our generalized other is the sum total of responses and expectations that we pick up from the people around us. We naturally give more weight to the views of significant others.

As I have mentioned a while ago social interactions have to do a lot in one’s personality. One’s self-concept and ‘generalized other’ are being affected as we tend to have social relationships with other people particularly in the community we are currently living to. Symbolic interactionism is the way we learn to interpret and give meaning to the world through our interactions with others.  

THE SELF: Reflections in a looking glass

Self-concept is developed through the process of interaction and communication with others. It is shaped by the reactions of significant others and by our perceptions of their reactions. Once developed, it provides an important motive for behavior (LaRossa & Reitzes, 1993).

Moreover, it is also the image we have of who and what we are (formed in childhood by how significant others treat/respond to us).  It is not fixed and unchanging—in my childhood years, my teachers tell me that I am naughty and talkative, but later in my life, I have developed my quietness when I was enrolled in a school wherein silence and self-discipline is strictly portrayed besides my mother have scolded me to do so. It was then my self-concept has been changed which probably could have led to my modest behavior.

COMMUNITY: The Socializing Effect of Others’ Expectations

Mead dismissed the idea that we could get glimpses of who we are through introspection. Symbolic interactionists are convinced that the self is a function of language. Without talk, there would be no self-concept, so one has to be a member of the community before consciousness of self sets in. The self is an ongoing process combining the “I” and the “me”. The “I” is the spontaneous driving force that fosters all that is novel, unpredictable and unorganized in the self. The “me” however is viewed as an object—the image of self seen in the looking glass of other people’s reactions (Griffin, 1997).

The term “generalized other” is a synonym for the “me”. The “me” is formed by those who surround you. The generalized other shapes how we think and interact within a community. It is the sum total of responses and expectations that we pick up from the people around us. We naturally give more weight to the views of significant others.

The generalized other is an organized set of information about what the general expectations and attitudes of a social group are. We refer to this whenever we try to behave or try to evaluate our behavior in a social situation. We take the position of the generalized other and assign meaning to ourselves and our actions. To summarize, there is no “me” at birth. The “me” is formed only through continual symbolic interaction—first with family, next with playmates, then in institutions like schools (Griffin, 1997).

The symbolic interactionism theory, I think, has a lot to do with my character—the totality of what comprises myself as a person. My experiences has molded a partial (although not a hundred percent) of me as to what I am now. My self-concept of today probably has become much more optimistic compared to my former experiences. Let me share to you a glimpse of what I have experienced during my late grade school and early high school days. It has to do with Mead’s concept of generalized other.

I will not forget that one incident during my sixth grade. It was the day when I first met the world’s meanest person to me. I was a transferee then. Looking out for a chair to sit on, I noticed that the one in the middle was empty and so I decided to go on it. I found everyone in the classroom so amiable and appreciated a ‘newbie’ like me except for that one. A girl with a name that starts with the letter "K" approached to where I was sitting and began to hit the desk of the chair saying something offensive. Terrified by her abruptness, I timidly said ‘sorry’ and was just like a dog lowering down its ears slowly leaving the chair. It was then when I started to feel that something would be going wrong all the way in my new school to where I was enrolled. I have already hated that girl the very first time I saw her. I was certainly sure that the feeling was just mutual. Every time I would be reciting, she would often criticize. Then, the rest of the class, especially her friends, would laugh with her. I have often been intimidated by that.

Her meanness continued until high school. I could hardly imagine why she, together with some of her friends, was like that to me. Their negative responses gradually reduced me into what I perceive myself to be—nothing but a sort of laughing stock. I was emotionally hurt every day. I did not even know if I was just being too sensitive or it was just her being too nasty.

            I associated the way my mean high school classmates, together with that girl with-a-name-that-starts-with-the-letter "K", treat and laugh at me to my personality. Probably because of my personality that made them hate me. As you’ve noticed their generalized other has shaped how I think and interact within my community. 

            However, I have later on learned the importance of acceptance of oneself. We may later on learn in life that we cannot really please everybody. Just be brave in the pursuit of your dreams.

Sources:

(Griffin, 1997) http://www.utwente.nl/cw/theorieenoverzicht/theory%20clusters/interpersonal%20communication%20and%20relations/symbolic_interactionism/

(LaRossa & Reitzes, 1993)  http://www.csun.edu/~whw2380/542/Symbolic%20Interactionism%20Lecture.htm

The Glaring Facts. Symbolic Interactionism—George Herbert Mead. Retrieved December 17, 2013. Retrieved from http://www.theglaringfacts.com/communications/comm-theories/symbolic-interactionism-george-herbert-mead/

FEAR IS THE OPPOSITE OF FAITH

Good morning my blog!

       Whew! It's another day again. Pressures are striking me. The ticking of the clock is quite moving too fast. Deadlines are arriving... But, I can see the beautiful sunrise of the sun outside the window. Probably, that gives me  hope. That is when I have unconsciously uttered "Thank you Lord for this another day!"

        Fear is the opposite of faith... Fear is the opposite of faith... This set of words repeatedly comes into my mind even when I was asleep. I don't know why. Maybe because I have been to anxious about lots of things. I want my heart to absorb those words--that when you have faith that all your needs will be met in perfect timing in the perfect way, there's no reason to feel afraid. But how could I be able to practice it? Hmm... Pray! Just a prayer may do I think. Probably I need to meditate on Bible and read Chuck Swindoll's Growing Strong in the Seasons of Life later on. Having such inspires me somehow. 

         But... something really bothers me. Honestly, I am still sleepy even though I just have an eight-hour of sleep or less I think. Probably, that's because I haven't had a continuous sleep. Paputol-putol kung baga ang tulog ko. Actually, I have been feeling a hunger even in my dreams. Oh! I remember last night that I have just eaten only chicken pie and milk as my dinner. I was not feeling well that night so I have not been able to eat rice. They would say that I need to gain some weight because I have been too skinny. My weight is not proportion to my height. My body mass index has been categorized as underweight. Hey! That's one fear of mine I need to overcome--the fear of being fat. That could be phagobphobia. When one is phagophobic, he/she is afraid to swallow his/her food because of his/her fear of being fat. I have been chubby during my high school days and so I have been very conscious about my weight. Well, anyway, that is past and I want to forget that past. I need to focus on the present. Fear is the opposite of faith! Probably I just need acceptance of myself. There's nothing wrong about being fat. They say that I am actually not that fat but I just need my weight to be proportioned with my height. Everyone is unique and has his/her own distinct beauty. Acceptance is the key. Wait. I am feeling very hungry now. I think I need to say goodbye and see you as I write a slice of my life here again!